I'm organised enough to do it!

Hi guys!
I haven't written for a long time... I haven't got time or/and possibility to do it, I must write 8 posts in 6 days, but I'm sure I will make it in time! I am supposed to write regularly, but I don't have any chances now. Anyway, I won't give up and I will write all posts before the deadline.
As I told you I don't like to write when I don't have vein, but I have to write new posts... Every time I see entries of other students I feel some deficiency, why are those posts so short? I know writing blog will be much easier for me, if I only wrote like others... but I won't! Because all my life I do everything not to be as everybody and I will do it till I have strenght.
It's really hard to be diffrent, specially if you're not... It sounds weird but that's exacly how I feel. I just hate ordinarity in myself, I totally respect it in others, but I hate moments when I realize that I don't know who I am. I don't want to see myself as another ordinary, boring teenager.
One of my quirks is that I love to expatiate... This is why it takes to me few days to write one post, and sometimes I read the text I've just wrote and I break down, beacuse it's so stupid... Do you know how it hurts?  You're working on something for few days, you spend lot of time on it and effects are terrible... One of worst feelings ever.
Now I feel really good because I write and write and I don't have any problems with that, funny thing is that I'm describing... nothing! I just sit at the computer and write, with no effort :) It's not vein because I don't really know what to write about, but I don't have problems with organising my thoughts.
My friends and me are supposed to write few sentences, lol I don't know how could I write such a short post... Even if I'd like to I just won't do that, because of my inner blockade.
I must think about topic for the next post, because I don't want it to be as boring as that one.
I'll write soon
xoxo
Julia B, 2B